12/29/13-Breathalyzer, Darth Bleeds, New Job

December 29, 2013

The night after Christmas, 3 cops went from room to room at 1:15am and breathalyzed each inmate. I sleep with my headphones on because Darth snores incredibly loud. Imagine waking up from deep rem in the middle of the night with a yellow tube shoved in your face and 3 men standing over you. I grabbed the tube to blow into it and apparently you’re not allowed to touch the device, just blow. I was in a bit of a haze and a black cop, who refers to himself as “The Real Police,” shouted at me “Do it right boy or you’ll go behind the fence.” They try to intimidate you with verbal jargon, anyways I blew and went back to sleep.

Darth takes blood thinners and apparently scratched himself after getting out of the shower. His legs are always a dark purple color from lack of circulation or some medical problem. His scratching made his legs bleed and because of the blood thinners his blood doesn’t clot easily. There were small pools of blood on the bathroom carpet and he tracked it into the room since he probably can’t see his legs. Grizz freaked out at him and scrubbed the entire bathroom with disinfectant. Another inmate named “Coach” got carried out on a stretcher last week…he has COPD and something went wrong. Another guy named Jimmy wear suspenders and walks with a cane. Each step Jimmy takes is about 3 inches in distance. He can hardly talk and frequently falls in the shower. I don’t understand the benefit of imprisoning these people that drain BOP medical costs at the expense of the taxpayers.

I started another new job in the kitchen. Ms. Sanchez, my boss, told me if I wanted to be cook I had to take my name off the list to get out of the kitchen…I declined. She seems to want a commitment…like a prison cook is a career move. Anyways, my days as a fryer were short lived and I am now veggie prep which she also wanted a commitment for, but her options were limited so she gave it to me. She tends to promote only young, caucasian guys. I’m not too bummed…draining the fryer wasn’t for me. My tasks in veggie prep include slicing hundreds of pounds of potatoes, carrots, onions, and lettuce. The products are all high quality…like the horse feed grade carrots the size of my arm.


Communication from Mr. Vend (9.29.13)

October 1, 2013

If you are trying to get in touch, Mr. Vend has had his communication minutes revoked for the rest of the month (which began last Thursday) Luckily, October isn’t far away! That said, as it was last communicated he won’t be able to use the phone or internet until hopefully early this week? Any questions, don’t hesitate to reach out to the author of this (aka his sister) and if you’d like to send snail mail, you can of course do that as well, I can supply the address. Just know everything you write is monitored and if you choose to send any letter, card or magazine (which you can, just no books) it will be reviewed first. 

Much love and appreciation for your support!

Not every date means marriage!

March 23, 2010

I realized I got myself caught up in this thought which is terrible…LIVE SOD L-I-V-E! So turns out I got picked up by a guy not once, but TWICE on Sunday. First round, at the grocery store, I picked up a bottle of sparkling water for this guy who turns out is a magician?! yes, he’s a professional JEWISH Magician…of course after asking my name and letting me cut him in line…he facebook friends me. Great!  Though to his credit he did drop a note suggesting we grab dinner or drinks sometime.

The second pick up was a bit different. I went to this bar on the UES to meet up with some friends. I noticed this super attractive guy (or so I thought for the 10 minutes we actually talked) was there who was friends with an out of town guest also with us at the bar. We barely got to talking, but discovered we had our Undergrad degrees in common. Of course people that know SOD know she’s a freak about the school! Anyway, ends up NotAJew (we will call him) puts his number and email in my phone and tells me to text him so he has my info….which leads to text after text after text which leads to him asking me to go Wine Tasting on Wednesday….um ok?!

Fast forward I leave the bar and head to spin…of course he’s making comments about my butt being hot (since I was wearing spandex pants) ANYWHO…he wanted to see me that night, I was like um no gotta wait for a good thing…then he’s like how about dinner and drinks tomorrow (as in last night). So I said sure…then he’s texting me all day yesterday and we end up going to a Last Comic Standing Comedy Show Club. Interesting experience….of course we were sat at a table with some loopy woman. It just went far too long. We had met at 7 and it was still going at 11pm. We snuck out and I hopped a cab while he hailed it and looked on his berry…we hugged and he’s like we’ll speak soon…so not sure if Wednesday is even on…but NotAJew has to prove himself anyway…he’s not the normal guy I would let court me since…ya, he’s not even Jewish. (Spare me I’m just saying!!!)

Truth be told…

March 18, 2010

I’m feeling a bit down. I know myself pretty well and when I’m down my body let’s me know. I’m sincerely believing more and more each day that I need to just start from scratch. Blogging about some of these guys is just worthless

I haven’t heard from any guy as of date…not even Shabbobabo. I have this event tonight…may see him, may not. I guess the key is I need to be patient. Last night, I was out at a happy hour and one of the things this guy said which struck a chord and continues to is that women don’t have “patience.” Ok, well depends how long you need said “patience” for. I think Michhottie is a lost cause…if he hasn’t made a move…he’s not gonna. I think I’m being super negative right now too and am hoping by venting here if you will, positive energy will come to me.

Who knows, maybe I’ll meet someone new and cool tonight. If I see Cookie d-bag I will be sure to just smile and move on. As my friend says I am “hopeful” but also keep these people in my stories because I enjoy the dramaewww. I don’t want that. I must continue to envision the man I do want…hopefully he finds me sooner rather than later!

Shabbat Shalom!

March 13, 2010

So I got to Shabbobabo’s house close to “leaving for temple time.” Yes, I had met him almost a month ago at an industry event where he told me about this and how I should come along with the fact he worked for Medical Marijuana which was NOT entirely true. Totally platonic? Maybe? I remember him being a flirt, but totally cute. So, Shabbo (Shabbat) and Babo (nickname for Babson, same small business school SOD’s lil brother went to college at) had some people come by before the Shabbat Service. We had it on calendar for weeks that I’d come to this, so leading up we were fb messaging back and forth. (ya, I dropped him a note after the event we met at and he emailed me back and added me on FB…fine).

I get there…He looked totally cute and I loved his apartment! He was trying to introduce me to people, but then found I was carrying my own (ha!).  He asked if the girls I was with or I cared for weed. I said I’m not opposed, the next thing he brings me this drink with weed in it…Pot soda? HAHA. I made the girls I was with drink it first and he smiles at me and comes back and is like…I’m like ya not happening! Who drinks that?! So then he put OJ in it…which is like heartburn issue #1 for me, so I politely declined and watched him drink it:)

So we were off to temple…he ended up sitting next to me and when we started singing songs he would like lean into me. I would make little random comments to him too, but I didn’t want to be overly flirty/touchy, though slightly tipsy. After the service we went upstairs to where they were serving wine and some food. I was hanging out with the girls I met at his place and ShabboBabo was busy schmoozing (as we Jews like to say) with others there. So fast forward, these girls and I were standing together when I forget the convo, but  Shabbobabo is with us and goes  to me, SOD, “I like your necklace, it’s beautiful.” I think my face turned red because I just wasn’t easily taking a compliment! ODD! He’s like “it’s the women that makes a necklace beautiful.” To which I said, “thank you, it was a gift to myself” and we smiled at eachother;) And then he looked at the other girl with us and he’s like that…eh (to her necklace)…she’s like so you are saying I’m not beautiful!? hahahaha

I was planning to leave and went up to him and said “thank you for inviting me this was a lot of fun” I don’t remember what he said after, but he hugged me and was like “ok, well I’ll see you soon!” 

That was that, I left as did he…I think he flew out to FL early on a flight this AM? I realize we didnt’ exchange ‘barcodes’ (for bbm) haha…nor does he have my phone digits, but I’ll presume…that I should let him find me on Facebook? OR???

“Whatcha got?”

March 9, 2010

Ya so I just sent Cookie Boy a note on Facebook since it’s now been a week since I said “oooh I can’t wait to hear what your idea(s) are first?!” With respect to what he said, “Let me think about something of value I can add”

Soooooooooooooooooooo…whatcha got -Senor Cookie Boi?! Fine, I think I’m being silly because I’m thinking subconciously he doesn’t like me, he honestly thinks I will just make him cookies like every other dumb girl, I don’t want to be… sigh.

Sometimes, I just really wonder what these guys think? I’m feeling confusion arise in my heart.

Reading too far into it…

March 6, 2010

First, NarcX’s cousin wrote me a random note yesterday like “is this your boy Evan?” with a link to a blurb on Perez of the figure skater Evan Lysacek…yes I know him…and yes…oh right, your b’day party is tonight. I totally didn’t go! YEAY me. Just not worth it to risk digression in seeing NarcissistX! I sent him a nice response today and apologized for not going to his paryt…didn’t say why. I’ll deal with cousin later!

Today, I was thinking about Michhottie, so I figured I’d be random. I sent him a text “How nice is this weather?! I bought a ticket to [the benefit], made me think of ya! :)”

He responded: “was beautiful out today…what did you do aside from buy a [benefit] ticket?  

glad you bought one…hopefully we will sellout…so i want all my friends to purchase sooner rather than later.”

You know the EXACT word in his response I’m reading into…our convo carried on, shooting the shit about a painter he went to visit today that is creating some art for the benefit and it ended with me sending a simple “:)” I just love that symbol, it sorta fits my personality so whatever. Anyway, he didn’t push me to buy a ticket early, so do I consider myself his friend? I mean he included me in his mass emails, but it wasn’t like def buy your ticket now before it sells out?

I wish he would have said “what are you up to tonight?” I didn’t have it in me to ask him myself…sigh.